Week 48 – bedtime

Despite him being almost a year old now, I’m still breastfeeding Reindeer. Weaning is going well, but he’s in no rush to drop his milk feeds and, if I’m honest, neither am I.

Prior to giving birth I wasn’t fussed about breastfeeding. In part because a lot of the information we were given was basically propaganda pushed really hard by the midwives. But also because the success rate seemed so low – lots of friends and family reported giving up within the first month, or being unable to breastfeed at all. 

Reindeer took to breastfeeding immediately and so I finally decided to look into it properly. Once I understood a little better, I decided to try for six months. That then became a year. Now I’m going to try for two years, based on the advice from the World Health Organisation.

Bedtime feeds are one of the best parts of the day. After a story, teeth brushing and a bath, Reindeer is usually really tired and snuggles in for a feed. I get a lovely cuddle and he curles up in my arms ready to feed and sleep. Some evenings I get extra smiles too. A couple of nights ago he decided to blow raspberries before falling asleep laughing.

As he relaxes into sleep he looks so very young and I’m trying very hard to commit this look to memory, as it isn’t one I can get on camera.

I’m astonished by how awesome this time together feels. A year ago I’d just begun maternity leave and didn’t have a clue what we’d let ourselves in for. I was worrying about the great unknown of childbirth (not without good cause as it turned out) and had no idea what was in store. 

These evenings are better than I dared hope.


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